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Let's Talk About Sex

Sex is not a dirty word and it should be talked about more… especially in the church. Here are 5 lies that single Christians should refuse to believe about their sexuality.

Lie #1 - Sexuality Serves No Purpose Until I’m Married

Lie #1 - Sexuality Serves No Purpose Until I’m Married

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Sexuality has always been God’s idea and He uses it to be glorified through singles and married couples. John Piper said, “The ultimate reason why we are sexual is to make God more fully knowable.” Our sexual desires reflect a deeper spiritual intimacy that God longs to have with us beyond what we can attain physically. Sexuality is therefore meant to be embraced and then properly stewarded. For singles, this means practicing abstinence.

Lie #2 - If I’m Tempted, There’s Something Wrong

Lie #2 - If I’m Tempted, There’s Something Wrong

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Temptation will come, expect it. In Genesis God tells Cain, “sin is [always] crouching at the door; and its desire is for you, but you must rule over it.” God is more concerned with how His children respond to satan’s schemes. Don’t allow condemnation to set-in, instead grab hold of the Holy Spirit and allow Jesus to be made strong in your areas of weakness.

Rita Panahi

Lie #3 - Sexual Purity Depends On The Physical Act of Sex

Lie #3 - Sexual Purity Depends On The Physical Act of Sex

Big misconception here. Watching porn, lusting after a crush and consuming sexually driven media all work to give the enemy a foothold in a person’s heart and mind. Jesus put it another way in saying, “I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Sexual purity begins with the heart, not just in the action.

Lie #4 - Holiness Is About Getting Rid of Desire

Lie #4 - Holiness Is About Getting Rid of Desire

The very fact that God created our desires is proof that ditching them is not His plan. This idea fosters a stoic, legalistic mindset that prevents Christians from enjoying their season of singleness. Holiness is allowing the Spirit to govern natural desires and sin is when natural desires are allowed to run the show. Desire is good, but without discipline it can lead you down a path full of unnecessary hurts.

Lie #5 -Once You Get Married Sex Won’t Be An Issue

Lie #5 -Once You Get Married Sex Won’t Be An Issue

The idea that once you say “I do” you won’t ever have to worry about sex issues throws many newlyweds off in those early years of marriage. Primarily because the challenges are different and unexpected. While being married means you’re free to have sex, it doesn’t exempt you from dealing with sexual temptations such as: extramarital flirting, marital sex conflict and past sexual memories. Whether you are single or married, bringing your sexuality under the submission of Christ will be a lifetime ongoing effort.